Most of the rules you're living by aren't yours.
You inherited them. From your parents, your school, your work, your marriage, from whoever you had to become to get through the hard bit. I help people work out which of those rules they actually chose, and what becomes possible when they put the rest down.
No fixing. No reinventing. No becoming someone else.
Read these. See which one stings.
If more than one of those landed, you're in the right place. And no, there is nothing wrong with you.
I work with people, and I work with organisations.
Same idea both times. People and companies run on rules nobody actually chose, and almost nobody stops to check which ones are still true.
The Unfiltering™
You built a filter. You didn't mean to. Every time you got hurt, promoted, dumped, praised or ignored, you adjusted. You worked out what got you approved of and you did more of it. You worked out what got you rejected and you buried it.
That filter kept you safe for years. It also buried you.
The Unfiltering™ is the work of taking it apart. Where each rule came from. Who it was really for. Whether you'd choose it again now that you know you have a choice.
Awareness creates choice. That is the entire point.
Most people can tell within about ten seconds which one they're in.
Your result is not a label. You move between stages depending on the area of your life. You could be Becoming in your career, Questioning in a relationship, and Surviving through grief.
Not sure which one you're in? Two minutes will tell you.
Understanding yourself is the beginning of freedom.
Six weeks inside The Unfiltering™
Six weeks. One conversation at a time. Just the two of us, working out what is actually yours and what you've been carrying for somebody else.
No worksheets you'll never finish. No pretending you're fine. No advice from someone who has read about this but hasn't lived it.
You'll leave understanding why you do what you do. Once you understand that, you get to choose differently. That is not a small thing. That is the whole thing.
I work with a small number of people at a time, so there's a short application. It takes about five minutes and I read every one myself.
Put me in front of your people
I speak to organisations, conferences and communities about identity, confidence, human behaviour and what actually happens when people rebuild.
Nobody leaves motivated. Motivation wears off by Tuesday. They leave thinking differently about themselves, and that lasts considerably longer.
Why I do this
I didn't set out to do this. I spent years building businesses and helping organisations grow, and I was good at it.
Then life took it apart. I lost people I loved. My marriage ended. I burned out properly. Not the tired kind. The kind where your body makes the decision for you.
Somewhere in the middle of that I worked out something uncomfortable. I had become excellent at performing a life I wasn't actually living. I knew exactly how to look successful. I had no idea who I was underneath it.
That's where The Unfiltering™ came from. It isn't theory. I built it because I needed it.
Start here. It's free and it stays free.
Practical tools you can use today. No fluff, no bullshit, and nothing you have to book a call to unlock.
What people say when I'm not in the room
"I finally got what it meant to feel better in my skin. I had tried to love myself like everyone said, but I didn't really know what that meant. Now I feel like I understand myself a bit better and that is so powerful."
Eve"Really loved you taking us through your story and leaving us with some practical tools to take home. Very relatable."
Kate Henderson · Willis Towers Watson"You truly have a gift, to be able to share and be so relatable to many on such a deep and personal level."
Carolyn Crawford"You articulate things really well, like really really well."
Jamie-Lee Makere"Digging your vibe gurl. Unfiltered honesty."
Margz_Roma73Say hello
The Unfiltering™, a speaking enquiry, or something you just want to tell someone. It comes to me and I answer it myself.